When the Right Person Walks In (Even If You’re a Hot Mess)

Our first photo together!

As a mom of five (yes, they all have the same father — thanks for asking), one of the questions I get all the time is:"How did you meet your husband?"But more often than not, the real question people want to ask (and some actually say out loud):"How did you find someone who wanted to deal with all those kids?"

Well, friends — it all started on Tinder.Yep. You read that right.

One Saturday night, out of boredom (and maybe a little Chardonnay), my friend grabbed my phone, created a profile for me, and threw me headfirst into the world of swiping. I treated it like a casino game — rapid-fire lefts, the occasional right, mostly just for laughs. It wasn’t about finding “The One.” It was about surviving a Saturday night and distracting myself from the chaos of my life.

Then, my oldest son ended up in the hospital for two days. It was scary, stressful, and of course, my ex was lurking around making everything worse. So I coped the only way I knew how at that time: swiping like a maniac during downtime.

Most of the messages I got were forgettable. A couple “Hey girl, sup” “What you doin baby girl” “you hot” and I was already mentally deleting the app.

But the Tuesday my son was discharged, I got a message from a guy with long hair and a real smile — not the tough-guy pose every other guy seemed to be doing. Something about him was different. He was warm, funny, and actually seemed like a person, a real live human being. We started messaging and hit it off immediately. We made plans to FaceTime the next night.

But there was a catch. I knew I had to tell him:“I don’t just have kids… I have FIVE kids.”

He was a little surprised, sure — who wouldn’t be? But it wasn’t an immediate “no.” That night, we FaceTimed, and I was instantly smitten. We talked for hours. It felt easy — and in my life, that was rare.

We made plans for a Friday night date.

That Friday, I handed the kids off to their father. He, of course, made a scene in the driveway — yelling “WE LOVE YOU” loud enough for the whole neighborhood to hear, throwing in a little “you’ll never move on” for dramatic flair. Classic. But eventually, they left and for once I felt excited about the weekend.

I ran inside, got dressed in record time, took two shots of vodka to calm my nerves, and at 6 PM sharp — there he was.

The cutest guy I’d ever seen. Long hair. Southern accent. Ripped jeans. I knew right then: I’m in trouble.

Dinner turned into breakfast.Breakfast turned into an entire weekend.By Sunday, I was buying face wash to keep at his apartment. Tinder? Deleted. iPhone locations? Shared. We were both all in.

He met the kids that Monday — I know, I know, it sounds crazy. But when you know, you know. And the kids loved him immediately. A week later, he met my mom. We were making Thanksgiving plans before we’d even hit the two-week mark.“I love yous” came fast.So did the healing. So did the peace.

Was I looking for a new husband? Absolutely not.Was I searching for a stepdad? (The boys jokingly call him that now—Step Daddy, lol.) Nope.But sometimes, life just smacks you in the face.

“How did I move on so quickly?”I didn’t. I had already moved on—years ago.When you're trying to leave an abusive relationship, the truth is, you fell out of love long before you left.In my mind, I hadn’t been married in years.

So yes, I fell in love. And even more beautifully—so did the kids.What can I say? God had plans for all of us.

That’s our love story. Messy, fast, and completely ours.And I wouldn’t change a single thing.